Warning: I Cry at the Weddings of Strangers

A wedding to take place just beyond our hotel room's balcony!

I'm the designated cryer of happy tears at weddings, graduations, christenings or brises. Hey, in every group, individuals have roles: leader, follower, prankster, peace-keeper, slacker, worker bee, and so on.  A cryer isn't called upon often, but I'm there when needed.

Earlier this week, Hubs and I fled Houston for two days on Lake Travis. Our room had a balcony overlooking water, and when we stepped outside to admire the view, we spied the set-up for a wedding. Hooray! For me, a wedding ranks much higher, amenity-wise, than HBO and fancy toiletries. We settled into deck chairs and prepared to watch the ceremony. I did not, however, grab tissues. This was, after all, the wedding of strangers. I had no memories of the bride and groom as toddlers, sulky teenagers, or young adults with their first full-time jobs. Someone else would weep on cue.

Wouldn't you know my eyes filled long before the bride appeared. The flower girl, who'd been skipping across the lawn moments earlier, froze when it came time for her to walk the aisle. Her daddy had to carry her plus her tiny basket of rose petals. The task of scattering the petals also fell to him since his daughter had wound her arms around his neck and buried her head between his neck and shoulder. 

Next, the mothers of the bride and groom walked the aisle to the tune of Simon and Garfunkel's "Bridge over Troubled Water."

It's not a typical processional, and I couldn't remember all the lyrics, but what I recalled told me these two moms had been there, really been there, for their kids. I saluted them with tears. 

"I'll take your part

When darkness comes

And pain is all around

Like a bridge over troubled water

I will lay me down."

Later in the ceremony, the moms stood beside the bride and groom. His arm looped over his mother's shoulder, and the bride held her mom's hand. I sniffled.

Throughout the ceremony, the writer in me made up stories. One of them may inspire a novel.

My take-away: 1. Weddings, no matter where, no matter whose, are magical. 2. Tears function as a canary in the coal mine--an early-warning system that indicates emotion is bubbling under the surface. As a writer, I want to tap that emotion. 3. Story ideas materialize in the most unexpected places. 

Do you cry at weddings? Make up stories about strangers? Arrive early to pick up friends and family at the airport so you can watch the people milling around baggage claim? 

Superlative news: Lark Howard, who started this blog and had to quit it due to her day-job responsibilities and evening writing schedule, made the finals of the Golden Heart, Romance Writers of America's prestigious contest for unpublished writers.  Yay, Lark!

What Sundress-Shopping Taught Me about Book Reviews

Soon I'll attend a wedding on a beach in a warm and festive locale. Because I've been focused on the "wedding" rather than the "beach" part, I hadn't given much thought to clothes.

Luckily, I talked to friend (and friend of this blog) Lark Howard last Saturday, and mentioned I was planning to wear a dress I'd already worn to a couple of weddings to the exchange of vows on the beach. Her initial reaction: utter stillness. That muted response warned me my tried-and-true dress, so appropriate in a traditional setting, would be a wash-out on the beach. 

Lark suggested a pretty sundress or white slacks and a knockout blouse, and I'm on the hunt. 

Tomorrow, I'll hit bricks-and-mortar stores, but in preparation, I've "shopped" online for ideas and inspiration and have read roughly 200 posted reviews of dresses. (Yes, that many. Apparently, women don't hold back when they like or hate a dress.)

Reading all those dress reviews changed my attitude toward book reviews. I used to think one-star reviews of books by my favorite authors were written by unhappy, impossible-to-please trolls or mean-spirited competitors. Now I view the giver of one-star as a pear-shaped woman with buyer's remorse over a pleated skirt.

It's easy to accept outlier opinions about dresses because a quick look around the office, gym, or street shows that two women, both size twelve, may be built so differently, it's hard to believe they wear the same size. What's more, we all have assets we want to play up and flaws we want to minimize. If I read ten reviews in a row that say a dress fits bigger than expected and one that says it's tight, I know the unhappy reviewer means the garment highlights an area she wanted to hide--or she gained weight and doesn't realize it. 

One-star book reviews may be written by plot-centric readers who find character-driven stories dull or by character-happy readers who prefer to take their pivot points with lots of introspection. If a main character reminds the reader of a hated ex, the book may be doomed from the start. If, on the other hand, a hero or heroine shares a name and traits with a loved one, the story may benefit from a unjustified halo effect.

Sundresses that require dry-cleaning are doomed from the start with me, and those that can be laundered and pulled from the dryer wrinkle-free get points. Why, then, are writers baffled by readers who won't pick up a 400-page book or say their workdays are so stressful they need light reads at night? "If you try this book, you'll like it," we say, forgetting that we'd shut the fitting-room door on a saleslady pushing linen. 

Some women won't consider a hot pink-colored item of clothing, and some readers won't pick up a book with a whiff of suspense. 

When a dress or book shopper steps outside her comfort zone and likes something she expected to hate, the result is especially sweet. The following is a compilation of phrases I read in those sundress reviews: "The sale price was irresistible, and I needed a dress at the last minute, so I tried on such-and-such and, to my surprise, it looked great on me."

As readers, haven't we stumbled across a writer and then read her entire backlist, including books we wouldn't have picked up before because the premise or plot didn't grab us? 

While some reviewers are impossible to please, others are too rah-rah. Read enough reviews, though, and it's possible to get a good feel for a sundress--or a book.

Wish me luck shopping!

Your turn: Do you read reviews? How much or how little do they influence you? Do you refuse to consider a certain color of garment or a certain genre of book? What was the last book that surprised you in a good way?

With a Little Help from My Friend

Tuesday marked Lark Howard's last blog post for Reading, Writing, and Rambling. I'm grieving, but she has a demanding (and important!) day job and a manuscript to deliver to her agent. Something had to give, and she'd already banished her television set to gain fiction-writing time. 

I'm grateful to Lark, who has inspired me in half-a-dozen ways. Let me explain.

• Remember the cool girl in high school? You know, the one who talked to everybody but had an edge and was interested in, say, alternative music while everyone else was bopping to a boy band? That's how I see Lark. I count myself lucky she invited me to sit at her table in the cafeteria.  (That's not to say I've become cool by osmosis. I'm still uncool, but my horizon's wider.)
• Many jobs ago, my horror of team projects was triggered by a couple of individuals who flat-out refused to pull their weight. Slackers lurk everywhere, and more than one group blog has failed because members claimed they couldn't think of anything to say, didn't support one another, or muffled one another with topics to avoid and stances to uphold. Lark has had my back from day one. She's easy to work with and reliable. (Yes, publishers, consider this a letter of recommendation. Snap her up.)
• Even when writing's a slog and the frustrations mount, Lark doesn't whine.
• All work and no play leave writers without a thing to say. Even though she has a lot on her plate, Lark feeds the muse with movies, books, day trips, longer journeys, and the occasional adventure. I think I'm daring when I buy a Groupon for a tapas restaurant. She buys one for a flight lesson over Houston. 
• Lark's love of all things French reawakened my inner Francophile—the one that had been slumbering since I had children and put away chunks of myself as too many moms do.
• Writing is, by its nature, solitary. While writers share work and gab face to face or via email with critique partners and beta readers, lonely stretches are part of the gig. Through this blog, I've gotten to know Lark and count her as a friend. Best gift ever!

I'm going to keep reading, writing, and rambling. Thanks to everyone who's stopped by and commented over the past year and a half. I hope you'll continue to visit as I struggle to discover enlightenment, publication, the perfect vacation spot, good health, cheap and delicious red wine, and an exercise plan that whittles away inches but doesn't require me to break a sweat. 

Godspeed, Lark! 

Don't Steal This Book!!!

Saturday night my DH and I attended my local RWA chapter holiday party. It was a fun affair where everyone brought food--heavy on the desserts--and a book for a White Elephant gift. Given that about 35 of the 40 attendees were writers (the other 5 or so were husbands), books were a great replacement for the bizarre items opened and stolen in past years. There were no rules about what kind of book except it couldn't be one written by the person who brought it. Needless to say, in this bunch there was no lack of creativity in the offerings.

Among the novels, self-help, picture books, histories, biographies and humor, one book stood out. It would have even if three people hadn't brought the same title. The first copy unwrapped was stolen twice ( the maximum number of steals allowed). The second I happily unwrapped and, glaring at the thieving Heather MacAllister who took it from me, had to choose again. A whisper of encouragement told me there was yet another copy in the dwindling pile. All I had to do was figure out which package it was in. Using all my powers of deduction--by that point dulled a bit by red wine--I grabbed a Christmas striped bag and VICTORY! Not only did I get The Book but the generous Christie Craig had included a terrific craft book in the bag. No one dared steal my treasure this time.

So what was the coveted title? FIFTY SHADES OF CHICKEN. It's a cook book with some rather steamy recipes. The trailer is hilarious and gives you the "flavor" of the writing. Check it out:

By the way, no one brought that Grey book.

So what were your favorite books of 2012? Is there one you hope to get for Christmas or Hanukkah this year?

DEYROLLE 2012

Director Wes Anderson at Deyrolle before the fire

On a cold and rainy January day seven years ago, my husband and I were wandering around Paris when a curious little garden shop caught our attention. Inside we found an assortment of tools, books and clothes but nothing remarkable enough to carry home to Texas.

As we were about to leave, the clerk told us there was a premier étage and pointed to a stairway at the back of the shop. Not wanting to be rude, we climbed the steps expecting more of the same and were stunned by what we found—a grand suite of rooms full of hundreds of stuffed animals posed as though they had frozen in mid-action when our feet hit the top stair. Like many before us, we had discovered Deyrolle, the cabinet de curiosités.

Under normal circumstances, I might have found all the taxidermy somewhat appalling, but there was something so charming and playful about the way the animals were arranged, I fell in love with the place and every creature in the extraordinary menagerie. I couldn’t help thinking, “Wouldn’t it be wonderful if whoever owns this place could bring these animals to life when no one was around?”

That man became Adrien Durand, the hero of the paranormal romance novel my agent has out on submission. Since then I’ve returned to Deyrolle many times, and have taken friends and family to visit my favorite place in Paris. Sadly about three years ago a fire destroyed most of the second story and with it hundreds of animals lovingly collected over more than a century.

The fictional place I call La Maison d’Ermonie has taken on a life of its own in my imagination—a fantastical world that is more real to me than the place that inspired it. I shouldn’t have been surprised this week when the somewhat reconstructed Deyrolle no longer held the enchantment of the original, but I was. Surprised and disappointed. The animals were no longer posed playfully and the whimsy has been lost. Change is inevitable but I still mourn the loss of a grand dining room set for dinner with a guest list of zebras, a donkey, a lion, a water buffalo and a goat presided over be a magnificent stuffed horse I named Maurice.

Have you ever revisited an old haunt or a literary shrine only to find time had stolen its magic? 

MASKS AND MAGIC

Saturday night my husband and I went to a masquerade ball thrown by one of his clients. Everyone wore formal dress--tuxedos for the men and ball gowns for the women--and masks. It was like going back in time to an era out of a historical novel. I've been to my share of black tie charity galas--the Heart Ball, the Winter Ball and even a rodeo ball where the men wore cowboy boots with their tuxes and the women got cowgirl creative with their formal wear--but this was the first time for a masquerade ball and the mystery was intriguing.

I wore a black gown, long black gloves and an ornate black-on-black half mask. My husband's mask was gold and cream with a headdress of black feathers. The host and hostess recognized us immediately as did the people we knew fairly well and vice versa. I couldn't help wondering how the heroines in romances conceal their identities so effectively the men have no idea who they were dancing with and, in some of the steamier stories, making love to. Really? I tried to pass my husband off as Tom Ford--same hair, stubble, general physique--but nobody bought that either.

Still, the evening was magical. Okay, the band played more contemporary music than Jane Austin would have expected, and Regency England didn't have the engineering skill to produce the 5" heels I danced in. Still, the champagne flowed, the food was divine and the guests diverse and amusing.

Around 11:30 the Latin guests began to arrive--the host has spent a lot of time in Mexico and South America and the hostess was originally from Columbia so this was expected. The tempo of the music  and the dancing shifted. We went out into the cool evening to catch our breath and sip our wine. At 1:30 we left a party in full swing, but we were tired and sleepy and ready for bed. Guess we aren't as young as we once were, but it was certainly a lovely evening to remember.

I love this scene from "Phantom of the Opera." All that's missing is Gerard Butler, although he shows up briefly at the end. Our party wasn't nearly so over the top but it was a masquerade....

Have you been to any memorable events lately? If you could throw any kind of a party, soiree, grand fete--what would it be and who would you invite?

WISH I'D SAID THAT!

I collect quotes. I've been writing them down in a datebook for years. Some of them are profound, some inspiring, some are witty. Others are of the bumper-sticker ilk. I thought I'd share some of my favorites today. I try to track down the source, but please correct me if I'm wrong and excuse me if I don't know who originally said/wrote it. So here we go:

"Happiness is what you choose to pay attention to." -- attrituted to Janis Joplin.

"Write drunk, edit sober." --writerly advice from Ernest Hemingway

"Computers let you make more mistakes faster than any other invention in human history with the exception of handguns and tequila." --Unknown

"I am the literary equivalent of Big Mac and fries." --Stephen King

"Easy ready is damn hard writing." --Nathaniel Hawthorne

"Ever notice 'what the hell' is always the right decision?" --Unknown Hollywood screenwriter

"Until one has loved an animal, part of one's soul remains unawakened." --Anatole France

"Happiness is good health and a bad memory." --Paul Newman

"Never give yourself a haircut after three alcoholic beverages of any kind." --Rules of Life

"Not all those who wander are lost." --J.R.R. Tolkien

Okay, so these are all over the place. Quelle surprise! Do you have any favorite quotes, sayings, bumper stickers you're willing to share? We'd love to hear them!

Let's Work Together

If you watch Project Runway, a reality television show about clothing designers vying for funding to produce their own line, you know the contestants hate team challenges. They'd rather succeed or fail on their own merits.

The same is true in the Top Chef kitchen. The contestants competing for the title of America's Top Chef dread group challenges. They don't want to be teamed with someone they consider less competent or lacking the desire to win at all costs.

Think of group projects you've participated in at work or school. In almost every three-person team, there's a Bossypants and a Slacker. I'm guessing you're neither, which means you had to maintain the peace, keep Bossypants rooted in reality, and make sure the Slacker contributed something. You probably did seventy percent of the work for the worst of all rewards: both Bossypants and Slacker vowed to pick you for every team they captained until the end of time.

The memory of one group project I worked on years ago still floods me with anxiety. It should have made me a permanent member of the "I'll do it myself" tribe, but I've been too lucky in partnerships to want to go it alone all the time.

I'm lucky to team with Lark on this blog. There have been days when I had a post due and not a thought in my head. Rather than let Lark down, I forced myself to come up with something. If this blog were mine alone, it would have gone dark months ago.

Do we ever really know someone until we've worked with him or her on a tough project? (Long ago, Hubs and I decided the true test of a relationship was the ability to hang wallpaper together.) Co-workers who initially struck me as flighty proved uber-dependable, and those who inspired confidence from a distance turned into cardboard up close.

Writers work alone for hours at a time, but it's the rare writer who doesn't need feedback from peers. I've been so lucky with critique partners, I'm joining yet another critique group. The prospect is scary but exhilarating. It's scary because the other members and I might not be a good fit, but it's exhilarating because we might discover our combined strengths compensate for our individual weaknesses. Most important is the reminder I'm never alone at the keyboard. Someone will read my words, and I'll read theirs.

Last week marked the one-year anniversary of We Are Not Alone, a blogging class I took with social-media expert Kristen Lamb.  The class lasted two months, but the rewards will continue indefinitely. I've made online friends and learned from them and their blogs. I rouse myself to comment on others' blogs rather than nod in recognition, smile, and log off. When my energy nosedives and I neglect to promote a post, one of my WANA buddies will tweet the link. I've celebrated with indie-published WANAs and wait with others for offers from traditional publishers. Through triumphs and disappointments, we know someone has our back.

A sense of solidarity fuels the writer alone in the crowd at the coffee shop. As Lark wrote in a post last week, the tools and encouragement we get from fellow writers propels us forward—and prompts us to give back.

Teamwork that brings out our best is worth seeking out and holding onto.  

Here's Canned Heat: on the topic:

    

Reading through Good Times and Bad

This post is about the authors whose books accompanied me through turning points, pulled me out of down times, and waltzed with me when things went well.

A post that promises to be long and winding deserves a soundtrack, don't you think? I give you the people of Open Books, a non-profit that promotes literacy and runs a bookstore in Chicago. They want to encourage those of us who've grown overfond of our e-readers to get out, browse the shelves, and pick up a print book. 

(Feel free to bust a move as you read on.) Earlier this month, Patricia Rickrode, who writes as Jansen Schmidt, gave me the Booker Award (not to be confused with the Man Booker Prize, ha!). Patricia also threw down a challenge: name my five favorite books and nominate three other bloggers for the award.

No way could I narrow down my favorite books to five, so I'm doing what Patricia did: naming influential authors. Each of my five taught me something/gave me something I needed at a particular point in my life. Just as a certain scarf, scent, or piece of jewelry evokes a particular time and place for me, so do these writers.

Mary Stewart – I must have been fourteen or fifteen when I discovered Mary Stewart and THE MOON SPINNERS. The windmill on the cover and exotic setting of Crete hooked me. Most of all, I remember a scene in which the hero and heroine drag themselves from the water. The heroine was wearing a bathing suit, but when she and the hero embraced, she thinks, "We might as well have been naked." That sentence switched on my sexuality. One minute I was a kid, and the next, I wasn't. While I loved THIS ROUGH MAGIC and AIRS ABOVE THE GROUND, and MY BROTHER MICHAEL, THE MOON SPINNERS was my first Stewart and is unforgettable because it opened me to possibility. An ordinary (although lovely and plucky) woman could stumble into and get herself out of danger--while falling in love. Stewart's settings also gave me a permanent hunger for travel.

Maeve Binchy – I'd been an English major in college, which meant I read so much literary fiction, I forgot why I liked to read. My mother passed along Maeve Binchy's first book, LIGHT A PENNY CANDLE, published thirty-two years ago. Binchy pulled me out of my mired-in-first-job funk and reminded me why I enjoy slipping into the lives of others and experiencing their problems, adventures, and triumphs. Binchy's books would accompany me through motherhood, two careers, and inspire me to write fiction.

Nora Roberts – I was a mom, working at a job that valued repartee, cynicism, and zeal for working long hours. Alas, I'm lousy at repartee, passed skepticism but failed at cynicism, and was wracked with guilt over the hours spent away from my family. Enter Nora Roberts. The first novel I read might have been SACRED SINS in 1987. Her stories offered escape, a fast pace, and lean prose—all appreciated by a working mom with little free time.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips – HEAVEN, TEXAS wasn't Susan Elizabeth Phillips' first book but was the first of hers I read. It was released in paperback in April, 1995, the month and year my then-employer, The Houston Post, printed its last newspaper. If one finds herself in unemployment hell, a feel-good story is as necessary as food and water. SEP came through for me again eleven years ago this week. After the Twin Towers fell, I turned to THIS HEART OF MINE. The story's heroine is a children's book author, and I clung to Daphne the Bunny and Benny the Badger as much as I leaned on the church-camp-turned-B&B setting with its pastel cottages and water views. This book was an emotional refuge for me, and I'm not exaggerating when I say I'd finish it one evening and re-start it the next.

My choice for writer number five is many writers. During Houston's hot, humid summers, I count on British and Irish writers for relief. Why? Cool, rainy settings refresh me when my front lawn is so dry it crackles. When the temps are in the nineties, I want books from Marian Keyes, Lucy Dillon, Maggie O'Farrell, Jojo Moyes, Marcia Willett, and the list goes on and on.

I haven't singled out favorite Houston-based writers, favorite writers I know personally, or favorite writers I've taken classes from because it's so hard to pick and choose from those groups, I didn't try.

The Booker Award  goes to the following bloggers: Lark Haward of THIS blog, Kay Hudson, and Karen McFarland. It never expires, so there's no pressure to post about it anytime soon.

Readers, your turn. What writer or book provided inpiration, comfort, or a kick in the pants at a particular point in your life?

SHARING THE RIDE

Last evening I drove with three writer friends, Sarah Andre, Jo Anne Banker and Kay Hudson to the release party for Shana Galen’s WHEN YOU GIVE A DUKE A DIAMOND. Hosted by Katy Budget Books, it was a wonderful event with champagne, cake, chocolate dipped strawberries and goodie bags filled with signed historical paperbacks, booksmarks, “real” diamond rings, body jewels and chocolate. 

I wish I could say we arrived promptly at 6:00 when Shana began her talk, but we didn’t get there until well into the Q&A. Given we’d driven an hour and a half in rush hour traffic, our tardiness was forgiven. Why, you may ask, did we drive that far and that long on a Monday night for a book signing? Because that’s what friends do. And many of the writers I’ve met through my local RWA chapters are indeed my friends.

And we weren’t the only chapter members to show up. Sophie Jordan, Ana Walker and Nicole Flockton were also there. After the signing, Sarah, Jo Anne and I took Kay out to dinner for her birthday. Sometime in the evening we remarked that if it wasn’t for writing and RWA, the four of us would never have crossed paths, and yet we’re sharing a journey non-writers find it hard to understand. Who in her right mind spends thousands of hours, years of her life in front of a keyboard pouring her heart and soul into a stories that may never be published? Yup, we do. Who subjects themselves to harsh criticism by contest judges, agents, editors and, if we’re lucky enough to get published, reviewers in pursuit of a career? We do.

Family and civilian friends support us, but after a couple of years with no books out on the shelves, they wonder if we’re crazy, lazy or delusional about our writing ability. Our writer friends understand the piles of rejections, the early manuscripts tucked under beds, the disappointment when our agent can’t sell a story we both love. They also share the triumphs of a contest win, a “full” request, an offer of representation from an agent, a book contract, and the release of a new book and a new series. One writer friend, Pat O'Dea Rosen, even agreed to be a part of this blog! 

My writer friends and I would never have met in our real lives for a thousand different reasons (age, geography, work, lifestyle, just to name a few) and yet they have become some of the most meaningful relationships in my life. In no other profession have I experienced the generosity, the willingness to help a newcomer along, the encouragement and empathy I have with these women. To all my writer friends I say—Thank you! You’re the best!

TWO NEW RELEASES YOU WON'T WANT TO MISS!!

I’m very excited that two of my favorite authors have releases this week.

Shana Galen’s historical romance WHEN YOU GIVE A DUKE A DIAMOND,  the first in her new Jewels of the Ton series. Shana’s books are always face-paced and original, and her characters never fail to be compelling. I also find her subtle wit especially entertaining. Can’t wait to read this one. Here’s the cover blurb:

HE HAD A PERFECTLY ORDERLY LIFE...

William, the sixth Duke of Pelham, enjoys his punctual. securely structured life. Orderly and predictable—that's the way he likes it. But he's in the public eye, and the scandal sheets will make up anything to sell papers. When the gossips link him to Juliette, one of the most beautiful and celebrated courtesans in London, chaos doesn't begin to describe what happens next...

UNTIL SHE CAME ALONG...

Juliette is nicknamed the Duchess of Dalliance, and has the cream of the nobility at her beck and call. It's seriously disruptive to have the duke who's the biggest catch on the Marriage Mart scaring her other suitors away. Then she discovers William's darkest secret and decides what he needs in his life is the kind of excitement only she can provide...

 

The second book is RELENTLESS PROTECTOR by master of romantic suspense, Colleen Thompson.  Colleen’s books take the writing advice “Torture your hero early and often” to a whole new level. Her books always keep me on the edge of my seat until the very end. Here’s the blurb:

Former army ranger Cole Sawyer reacts on instinct when he sees beautiful young widow Lisa Meador pull a gun at the bank. He foils the robbery, but when Lisa screams as the real robbers take off with her son, he realizes that things aren't what they seem. Driven by a painful secret, Cole makes the split-second decision to join forces with Lisa and trail the criminals across Texas.

Haunted by his failure to save Lisa's husband in Afghanistan, Cole is determined to help her rescue her son. But he's even more determined not to give in to his growing attraction to her. As they untangle clues and face the potentially devastating loss of their quarry, they soon realize that the kidnappers' motives run deeper—and darker—than they ever expected.…

Both of these authors will be signing at West Houston RWA this Saturday and Katy Budget Books is throwing a huge release party for Shana's new series! 

Can't wait to dive into these stories! Are there any new releases you want to recommend? 

 

Defending Genre Fiction...Not that it needs it

This weekend a friend gave me a DVD of her new favorite movie, THE OTHER MAN. (Spoiler warning: if this is on your dying-to-see list, don’t read on) She told me to tell her I loved it even if I didn’t. Looks like I’m going to lie.

I love romance novels so watching a story where a wife (Laura Linney) while dying of cancer sets up her husband (Liam Neeson) to discover her infidelity after her death—well, I’ve got a problem with the b*!#$! Everything we see on screen shows a loving relationship and yet she leads him to discover she had an affair with a janitor ( Antonio Banderas, but still…) in Milan and leaves pictures on her laptop of them together. Naked. The cruelty was inconceivable to me and as a result I couldn’t believe two men could love this woman so deeply. Hey, in romance the heroine has to deserve the hero and vice versa or they don't get their happily-ever-after.

When the movie was over I realized that for my friend it was a cinematic equivalent of a literary novel. She's made it clear she thinks romance novels are trite and formulaic and yet I think she misses the point. Like all genre fiction, romance is entertainment, and yet there’s an integrity to the stories, characters and relationships that I love. No romance heroine would intentionally inflict pain on the man she loved in such a heartless, selfish and irrevocable way. Yeah, they make mistakes and hurt people they love, but never deliberately and cruelly.

In romance we create a lot of flawed characters and torture them into redemption. But redeem them, we do. One of my favorite writers, J.R. Ward, has written the Black Dagger Brotherhood series in which horribly damaged, murderous vampire warriors find redemption in order to make a life with the females they love. This is an edgy series that has limited appeal even in the paranormal romance world, and yet these characters do their best to love, protect and nurture—and any hurt they inflict is unintentional and sorely regretted. Their happily-ever-after isn’t guaranteed, we know they’ll always have to work at their relationships, and yet they try to be the best people, or vampires, they can be. Call me shallow, say I live in a fantasy world, but that’s the life I want to live—one of caring and integrity.

Expand to other genres--thriller, sci-fi, fantasy, suspense, mystery—and the moral compass still points to good, not evil. Sure, some protagonists have a dark side but they also have a moral code—think Mitch Rapp, Jack Reacher and any action hero Jason Statham plays on screen. We love them because we want good to triumph and for the hero to do the right thing. It’s human nature. Hmmm. Maybe genre fiction says more about who we are than literary fiction after all.

There are great pieces of literature that I love and cherish in my library, books I read over and over. On the other hand, I’m still on page 22 of A Confederacy of Dunces and not likely to get much further no matter what prize it won. 

What’s your guilty pleasure? What books move you and bring a smile to your face? 

FLYING!!!

Cesna 152 - The one I flew was blue!

Last Friday I took a flying lesson—as in private pilot license lesson. It was really more of an introduction but I was shown the basics and got to take the controls to climb from 1000’ to 2000’, turn, bank,fly around the countryside and descend again. Of course, I didn’t take off or land, but doing something I’ve wanted to do since I first climbed into a private plane in my late 20s was thrilling.

Getting a pilot’s license has been on my Bucket List forever. Actually doing it has always been too expensive, too time-consuming or otherwise inaccessible and yet the dream has lingered. I realized as we landed that the choice was mine—was the time, money and hard work worth the end result or not? I haven’t decided yet. I’m leaning toward yes. My DH is sure the answer is no-- the risk isn’t worth it.

Oddly enough, physical risk had never entered my mind. Perhaps all those outlandish adventures I survived in my youth have given me an unrealistic sense of immortality, or maybe focusing on the experience didn’t leave room for trepidation. Whatever it was, I’d still like to go again, learn to fly, get a plane and have adventures. Ati, my instructor, videoed a few seconds of me flying with my iPhone:

I had a ball and I’m sure I’ll never feel the pure terror in the skies that I felt the first time I pitched my novel to an agent and editor. THAT was scary—really, really scary.

What’s on your Bucket List?  Have you ever forced yourself to try something that scared the bejesus out of you?

Visiting THE BALLROOM

At the 2012 RWA National Conference I attended a workshop called "Have a Ball with Your Blog: Fostering an Online Community for Readers" where six fabulous historical romance writers (Sarah MacLean, Tessa Dare, Miranda Neville, Sabrina Darby, Lauren Willig and Kate Noble) talked about their blog, The Ballroom. 

 All of these authors write Regency Romances, stories set in England in the early 19^th century and the most popular of historical genres. In these romances, much of the action is likely to take place in ballrooms where lovely young women and dashing aristocratic men meet under the scrutiny of the ton. By a stroke of creative genius, these authors have created a blog ballroom supervised by an ever-gracious hostess, Lady B, and visited by authors and the characters in their books in a fun mash-up of time and cultures.

Each author has adopted a Ballroom personality while remaining herself. Occasionally the hero of a book scandalizes Lady B or or a heroine enlists help in catching the eye of a handsome young lord. There are polls,quizzes, parlor games, holiday parties and guest posts by visiting authors. Last week, Sophie Jordan and Cleo Hadley (the heroine of LESSONS FROM A SCANDALOUS BRIDE) joined Sarah MacLean and Lady B to find Cleo a match. 

Each post is a story in itself--interaction between author, characters and Ballroom regulars that anyone can join in. I was delighted by the wit, not only of the poster, but also in the comments as authors and visitors get into the spirit of Regency romance.

There are thousands of blogs out there with all kinds of purposes and themes. The Ballroom stands out for me as a place to enjoy the whimsy and creativity of a brilliant group of writers who invite us to hang out with them in the imaginary world of their books and an era that has inspired an entire genre of romance. If you enjoy historicals, check it out!

Are there any blogs you find especially fun to visit? Please share!

Hello, People, it's Lady Gaga!

What is it with the media and nudity? A recent style news article in People Magazine began:

We thought there was nothing else Lady Gaga could do to shock us, but leave it to the envelope-pushing singer to make jaws drop yet again. And this time it’s not about what she wore, it’s about what she didn’t wear.

So what’s she done now that shocked People mag? She Tweeted a picture of the ad campaign for her new perfume where she’s naked except for strategically placed little men and a black mask.  I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that the men were Photoshopped onto her body and, really, folks, this is a young woman who calls herself Lady Gaga. But I won’t leave you in the dark. Here’s the ad.

Whether or not you like her music (for the most part I do), she’s a twenty six year old eccentric pop star known for being outrageous. And yet the advert reminded me of the work of several prominent surrealist artists and sculptors. There’s an artistic originality to the concept as well as Lady Gaga’s signature style. I’ll reserve judgment on the fragrance itself which People describes as:  “the first-ever black perfume” (it turns clear once spritzed) the aroma is described as dark, sensual and light according to WWD. The fragrance features notes of belladonna, incense, saffron, honey, apricot nectar, crushed tiger orchid, and jasmine sambac (not blood and bodily fluids as rumored). Hmmmmm. It sounds interesting to me.

I’ll admit I’m all for young artists pushing boundaries, working outside the box, doing new things or old things in a new way. The rock stars of the sixties and seventies shocked parents while thrilling and inspiring young people. The Rolling Stones and Beatles were revolutionary. Eric Clapton was a brilliant junkie musician. Sting, Elton John, David Bowie outraged plenty of “adults” in their youth. And now that these artists are in their 50’s, 60’s and, yes, even their 70’s, we tend to forget the uproar they once caused.

I’m delighted that young artists can still find recognition in being themselves in a world where beauty and celebrity often trumps talent. Lady Gaga, Adele, Katy Perry, Beyoncé and the rest—I hope they mature into their talent and last beyond the sizzle and flash. Youthful outrageousness will be forgiven if these talented women continue to grow.

 

(Note to Madonna—You, dear, are WAY past being young. Time to wear clothes and behave yourself.)

So what do you think of the the ad? Of Lady Gaga? Of Madonna? Is anything else on your mind today?

OMG! I'm a nerd!!

Sometimes the truth hits you like a π in the face. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist.) I use to think I was kind of cool—a delusion perpetuated by YA author Tera Lynn Childs at a book signing at Blue Willow Bookstore a couple years ago.  That was before I noticed which Facebook photos and links I can’t help sharing. The photo above pretty much illustrates my point.

The truth is, I love nerdy humor and take great delight in figuring out geeky puzzles like Legos cartoon characters. George Takei—the actor who played Sulu in the original Star Trek with William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy—regularly posts hilarious pics he gets from fans with captions like: “Use the force, Harry.” –Gandalf. Or advertisements for Viagra altered to ads for Spice (yup, as in Frank Herbert’s DUNE series.) I laughed and shared. I couldn’t help myself.

So what have you learned about yourself from Facebook, the internet, online shopping, SKYPE, i-Anything? What surprises you about the things you find fascinating online that never hit your radar otherwise? 

WHAT'S IN A NAME?

Would he be more handsome if his name was Ryan?

I’ve always had a thing about names so when I came across a piece from NPR called Baby Names: The Latest Partisan Divide?,  I couldn’t resist reading it. Apparently people in the conservative Midwest choose more creative and androgynous names like Paislee, Liberty, Rykan and Scottlynn for their children while New Englander’s favor traditional names such as Evan, Elizabeth, Rachel, Abigail and John. Hmmm.  An interesting study.

As a writer I think a lot about characters’ names before committing to them because I know how important it is for the reader connect with the persona I’m creating as quickly as possible. If my heroine is strong and adventuresome, Molly or Tillie won’t communicate those traits. An alpha-hero can be Will, Jake or Roarke but not Billy, Walter or Elmer.  A lot has been written about how names affect peoples’ reaction to a person. The BBC asked, “Would he be more handsome if his name was Ryan?” over a picture of George Clooney. Archibald Leach was certainly more attractive as Cary Grant and Betty Joan Perske was much sexier as Lauren Bacall. Would Tom Cruise still be a star as Thomas Mapother IV? And, yes, there’s a website with celebrities’real names if you want to see more. 

Historical author  Shana Galen wrote a great blog post about naming characters  where she said, “The author also has to choose a name she can live with for six months. If my archenemy is named Gabrielle, I’m not going to want to write that name a dozen times a day.” Good advice! She also warns that difficult spelling and pronunciation.   

If you want to know what names were popular in the United States when an American character was born, the Social Security website lets you search the most popular names by year.    This site can eat a lot of time, but it’s also fascinating to see how the popularity of names changes. Dorothy, Betty and Joan were common in the 1930’s, and disappeared from the list in the 1950’s when Linda, Susan, Barbara and Nancy hit the top 20. By the 2000’s, none of these girls names appeared in the top 200. On the other hand, Michael has been near the top of the boys’ names list since the 1940’s, and James and William have never dropped off. Does this data fascinate anyone else?

So what names do you respond to positively or negatively? Are there any that would turn you off to a character or book instantly? Any that would create instant rapport?

Share the Blog Love

Months ago, fiction writer/blogger Sally Driscoll honored me with the Liebster Award. Although I was thrilled, I was afraid it came with tough-to-follow rules like tell ten deep, dark secrets on your blog, write twelve pages of fan fiction about a character in your work-in-progress, and rearrange your writing space according to feng shui principles. I should have trusted Sally. When I looked up the award's background, I found it's given to bloggers who inspired the giver in some way and who have fewer than 200 followers. Liebster comes from the German word meaning "beloved, dearest, or favorite." Danke, Sally!

Here are the only rules I found:

1. Link back to the person who gave it to you and thank them.

2. Post the award to your blog.

3. Give the award to 5 bloggers with less than 200 followers that you appreciate and value.

4. Leave a comment on the 5 blogs to let them know that they have received this award.

In other words, the award is a way for me to alert others to blogs I find meaningful Since many blogs speak to me, the 200-followers stipulation came in handy. I was able to rule out blogs that post total numbers of followers. The blogs I cite here may have many more than 200 followers but don't post numbers, or only post numbers of e-mail subscribers. I'm happy to play dumb.

By the way, even small blogs like this one have long reaches. Lark Howard's post on her visit to Lourdes, France has been viewed more than 2000 times.

My first two Liebster nominees are fellow members of RWA's Women's Fiction Chapter

Florence Fois grew up, raised a family, and worked in NYC. Her blog, FoIS in the City celebrates
the food, landmarks, street games, and people of the five boroughs.

Rosemary DiBattista is a Jersey Girl with a love of Shakespeare, good food, and the shore. Murder Marinara, the first in her Casa Lido mystery series, will be published by Penguin/NAL in early 2014.

Eden Mabee recently joined my WANA group. WANA stands for We Are Not Alone. The acronym has nothing to do with Roswell or alien sightings; it expresses social-media expert Kristen Lamb's view that writers must band together to help one another promote blogs/market books/encourage creativity. Eden's blog, Many Worlds from Many Minds, offers musings on writing, motherhood, and other topics as well as snippets from Eden's older works.

Reetta Raitanen has been an important part of my WANA group from the beginning, but she took her sweet time launching her blog. (One look at it, and you'll know why; she's a perfectionist.) The Dark Side Has Chocolate offers lots of links for writers as well as posts on whatever captures Reetta's fantasy/urban fantasy-loving heart. By the way, she's a Finn but blogs in English. Impressive, huh?

Sally Driscoll, who set this Liebster Award post in motion, recently published two short stories, Sleep and Rage, in a genre she dubs "Mommy Noir." I find that term evocative--and it reminds me of the dark moments I experienced when raising my kids. Alas, mommy-blogs didn't exist then, and I could have used the virtual support, laughs, and wisdom.

My fifth nomination for the Liebster Award goes to a group of young writer moms, including Houston's own Shana Galen, who blog at Peanut Butter on the Keyboard. They tackle a range of topics with humor, honesty and smarts. How I wish that blog had been around in the 80's.

I hope you enjoy reading the blogs of my Liebster nominees, and I hope they don't wait as long as I did to share the love. Thanks, again, Sally!

OFF THE BEATEN PATH -- ICELAND?

The Lonely Planet newsletter a few months back had an article on the Best in Travel Readers’ Choice Award  and the winner was Iceland. Iceland? There are many places I’d like to go but Iceland never crossed my mind. Ever. Not because if the Ice part of its name—I live in Houston so I fantasize about cold weather five months a year—but I’ve never met anyone who has even been there. So I read the article and found myself wondering if it might be a fun adventure destination for the following reasons given by LP readers:

• Volcanoes, aurora, glaciers, icebergs, incredible displays of nature!
• Back-country areas are still largely undiscovered
• Geothermally heated pools to refresh the soul
• Hip, cool Reykjavik
• Affordable compared to the rest of Europe

But the one that really got me was:

Puffins!!! Who wouldn’t want to see puffins?!!

So does anyone have any suggestions for an unconventional vacation destination? What about short-breaks and road-trips?  Where are you going this summer?

WISDOM -- I TAKE IT WHERE I CAN GET IT

I'm attending a non-writer business conference this week. The organization is a consortium of some of the most innovative and successful people in their industry. Yesterday I attended a session where the speaker addressed the challenge of staying motivated over a long and often difficult career. Some of his advice hit home to me as a writer.

• Visualize what could be and don't let anyone tell you your dreams are impossible.
• Do what you do well regardless of what everyone else is doing. Following the herd will only lead to mediocrity.
• Focus on the things that take you closer to your goal and let go of things that merely suck your time and energy.
• Keep things in perspective. Avoid getting too low when things get rough, it'll get better. On the other hand, don't get carried away celebrating your victories because tomorrow you need to suit up and perform again or lose your momentum. 

No matter what path someone takes, apparently the map to success and happiness are pretty much the same. What's the best advice anyone ever gave you?